A child born will always have an original family tree. Roots beneath the ground wait to be exhumed from a premature burial. Rulings in court proceedings are made without input of blood relations. Mission statements are surrounded by quotations of good intentions, but not the law.
Grandparents can give love, care, extend compassion and be a role model. Positive conversation for grandchildrens ears to hear, visions of expressed manners and safety for eyes to see, and an alcohol- and drug-free dwelling for zero tolerance of endangering or subjecting a child to an injurious environment. Grandparents and grandchildren are severed, among many other blood-related family members, too. Grandparents are severed and dealt a premature burial to the relationship before they die. Grandparents are judged with discrimination automatically for choices of their grown children.
Blood is the sap line of the lifeline in a family tree. The water supply to this blood is from the tears of the primary limbs of each grown adult child. The secondary limb on each side is that each adult has a set of separate parents, thus, leading to two sets of grandparentsnot one.
A family tree has branches and roots of authenticity. Too often, before the second of 60 passes into a minute, family trees are formatted into one side. It is disheartening that agencies have mission statements in quotations for an outside appearance, but this is deceiving in regard to a grandparent and grandchild relationship.
Parents can raise their kids to the best of their ability. The world does not go away until the point of ones death. Outside influences are everywhere. The only one someone can control is himself/herself. Parents who have strength to leave an injurious environment/domestic relationship before the intervention of agencies or court are too few.
Grandchildren are a gift from God in Heaven. Too many parents take Gods blessings in their life for granted. These choices are not of a grandparents free will or in their control. Also, it is not our choice at birth who our parents will be.
Foster parents, strangers and all others who pretend will never be of a bloodline-related authentic family tree. My heart breaks for grandparents and grandchildren (especially toddlers and newborn babies) who have no way to understand who has been cut off from the branches.
Donna Parks is a resident of Rockford and a grandmother of four children.
from the July 25-31, 2007, issue